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Nine and a half years ago, my life changed. A lot.
Things were really, really bad. Everything was changing around me, and I felt horribly powerless and afraid. All the time. Finally, the dam broke when someone close to me killed herself. I still mourn her, you know, and the irony of it all is if she hadn't done that, I wouldn't have gotten help for myself. Gratitude side by side with grief, oh yes. ( Read more... )
Which brings me to the point of this post.
I'm so sad and so sorry that people in my community are unkind. It makes me spectacularly angry as well, but I recognize that trap and choose to carefully tread around it at the moment. I understand anger; we all do. It's okay to be pissed. Or hurt. Or sad. Even furious.
What is NOT okay in my book is choosing (and it is a CHOICE) to attack. To deliberately and willfully orchestrate hurtful attacks against someone is wrong.
It hurts. It's not necessary, you know, to hurt people. There are other ways to behave, other choices you can make to get your point across.
I know you're probably very, very unhappy but that doesn't make your actions okay. Understandable, yes. But not excusable. I can only imagine how uncomfortable it must be to feel that much rage...because splashing it around and throwing it at people provides only momentary relief. I remember how that worked for me, and I also remember how great it felt to unload alllll over somebody (preferably behind their back but semi-publically, so I wouldn't have to take actual responsibility for my vitriol). They were SORRY, by christ. Yeah, it was a terrific feeling...until the next person crossed me and I flew into yet another drama-filled rage. Wash, rinse, repeat.
You don't have to feel that way if you don't want to.
You don't have to be a rageful, angry person if you don't want to be.
You don't have to. I'm certainly living proof of that.
Wishing you peace,
Peggy Sue
Things were really, really bad. Everything was changing around me, and I felt horribly powerless and afraid. All the time. Finally, the dam broke when someone close to me killed herself. I still mourn her, you know, and the irony of it all is if she hadn't done that, I wouldn't have gotten help for myself. Gratitude side by side with grief, oh yes. ( Read more... )
Which brings me to the point of this post.
I'm so sad and so sorry that people in my community are unkind. It makes me spectacularly angry as well, but I recognize that trap and choose to carefully tread around it at the moment. I understand anger; we all do. It's okay to be pissed. Or hurt. Or sad. Even furious.
What is NOT okay in my book is choosing (and it is a CHOICE) to attack. To deliberately and willfully orchestrate hurtful attacks against someone is wrong.
It hurts. It's not necessary, you know, to hurt people. There are other ways to behave, other choices you can make to get your point across.
I know you're probably very, very unhappy but that doesn't make your actions okay. Understandable, yes. But not excusable. I can only imagine how uncomfortable it must be to feel that much rage...because splashing it around and throwing it at people provides only momentary relief. I remember how that worked for me, and I also remember how great it felt to unload alllll over somebody (preferably behind their back but semi-publically, so I wouldn't have to take actual responsibility for my vitriol). They were SORRY, by christ. Yeah, it was a terrific feeling...until the next person crossed me and I flew into yet another drama-filled rage. Wash, rinse, repeat.
You don't have to feel that way if you don't want to.
You don't have to be a rageful, angry person if you don't want to be.
You don't have to. I'm certainly living proof of that.
Wishing you peace,
Peggy Sue
